Free Again

I just need to feel Free again

I need to be Just Me again

In my natural state

Is where I’m great

Independence is my strength.

Advertisements

The Fem Body Complex

It’s easy to get so caught up in what “Looks Beautiful” that you forget that you already are…

I’ve been dealing with this pressure lately. Even though I have spent years learning to Love and Accept the Real Me sometimes I still lose it and get stuck in the trap of feeling “Am I enough?”

Its easy to lose perspective when you are a Dancer who always seems to find herself on the Outside looking in…On top of that, Broke and Desperate wondering what it will take to get me from Point A to B??

Would it help if I looked more like a stripper with a small waist and Huge Ass, a Barbie Face and perfect, long hair??

Of course I know how Superficial and Anti-Feminist this “standard” for Female Beauty is but let’s face it….

These Girls Get PAID!

And not the Bullsht money you have to work over 40 hours at a crappy job for…

When I look at them, I find myself thinking it can’t be so hard to look like that…

Then I look at my own body…My angular shoulders, muscular arms, long legs, size A chest, and size 10 feet and I question my femininity…

Am I enough? Will I be accepted like this?

In the back of my mind, I hear my own voice saying You Are Beautiful as You Are! I hear my girlfriend’s voice saying I’m Beautiful, Sexy, And she wouldn’t change a thing… But still I am self conscious.

So I’m faced with these two perspectives, pondering these questions on a daily basis…

How do I get back to that place of Self Love and Acceptance??

Is it worth it to compromise to get what I want faster??

To be Continued

Hello, New York, Goodbye Fear!

I’ve reached the point where I no longer feel afraid in my skin. I can embrace myself as an aspiring artist, teacher, dancer, androgynous,  black, female Boss on a mission to be sucessful in all I do.

I’ve  dealt with the pain of rejection, heartbreak, and loneliness for my whole life. In the end, it’s the reason I am strong enough to stand on my own.

So be afraid of who? For what?

I didn’t move to NY to live afraid. I came here because I am Ready to give it all to live my dream. I have the confidence that I can do whatever I set my mind to.

What’s the worst that can happen to me? Someone thinks I am untalented? Oh well, I know who I am and I have nothing to prove. The only competition is against myself. The only limitations are my own beliefs.